I have never seen a full Brewers season where they make the playoffs. Born in July 1982, I missed that amazing World Series run. It’s been a long 25 years- the longest playoff drought in baseball. With a young team of quality stars and shrewd management, we’re boldly making our move. I get so excited thinking about the Brewers now, a little pee comes out. In fact,

When the Brewers
make the playoffs
I will pee my pants.

Saturday, May 17, 2008 - Congrats Mark DeFelice

What a great story- working for 25 years in the minors and then finally makes it to the Majors and wins the Cy Young for us and pitches in two Game 7 wins as he hits a homer for a kid sick from eating too many s'mores (me). DOUBLEHEADER TONIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Friday, May 16, 2008 - Slipping Up

Get ready for a terrible extended analogy: I was just taking a shower and as I reached to turn on the cold (it was scalding hot)- I slipped and was doing the whole Bugs Bunny waving my hands, spinning my legs thing- trying to stay up. I nearly broke two glasses on the sink, knocked my toothbrush to the area behind the toilet (gross), and nearly ripped the shower curtain down. I had a brief flash-forward of actually falling and breaking my melon in two. Luckily, I'm part ninja and regained my balance.

I think the Brewers season right now is kind of slipping up in the shower. After the Cards series and first game against the Dodgers- I thought we had righted ourselves and were back to washing the armpits. But Sheets exploding for 6 runs (not on offense) was a difficult pill to swallow. We need to install a slip-resistant mat. Maybe we should bring up the Polish Sausage to run bases.
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Thursday, May 15, 2008 - All Tied Up

Ryan Braun's 7-year deal will be announced today. That's fantastic. He really is a huge stud. Sometimes during the season, I'm just focusing game-to-game and forget about the overall team's strategy for several years. Well, not Doug Melvin- that's why his name is Dougie Melvinie per Yosty.

In case you didn't know, the Internet is a scary place. Image searches for "tied up" can lead to some frightening things. Also, PYPFTB had a tremendous uptick in traffic last week due to a post about us on a site in Denmark devoted to women peeing their pants- WEIRD!
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Wednesday, May 14, 2008 - Cheers to Gagne

So the link to the training vid is back up. Don't notify Big Brother at MLB because apparently they like to knock down awesomeness. I think the training might be useful again after our offense's showing up again and the great get by Gagne.

He asked for the ball and Yost trusted him. He gave him the ball. Then Gagne pitched (with the crowd behind him). And man did Gagne make it interesting with the single and the walk and the huge rip out to Corey in right. But you know what? He got the W.

Torres was dominant as usual- giving two 1-2-3 innings. And Ryan Braun is the king! Did you see the stat that he's the fastest player to get past 40 home runs? He did it in 352 days- 2 days faster than McGwire.
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Tuesday, May 13, 2008 - Oh my God, We're Back Again

Brothers, sisters, everybody sing
We're gonna bring the flavor show you how
I've gotta question for ya
Better answer now
Am I original? (yeah)
Am I the only one? (yeah)
Am I sexual? (yeah)
Am I everything you need?
You better rock your body now!

I think if you substituted the Brewers offense for the Backstreet Boys, you'd be right about who's back in town. That game was awesome! Ryan Braun is too good to be true. Does he look crazy to anyone else? I'm not sure how much I trust the guy because he's so dang serious. That's cool. Get all serious Braunie and keep having 2-dong games.

Great pitching by Bushie. A little weird that Gagnie wants his job back after giving up a run in 2 innings. And what's up with 4 walks? Who cares- we just took 3 out of 4 from the stinky Cards.
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Monday, May 12, 2008 - Happy Birthday To Us!

PYPFTB launched one year ago (5 days ago) on May 7th! It's been a long road everyone and hopefully it can end this season. The goal of this site is the same as a hospital's- to make ourselves extinct. I don't want sick people and I don't want the Brewers not in the playoffs. VERY encouraging performance by our pink bats yesterday- and the closing mechanism worked to perfection.
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Sunday, May 11, 2008 - I stink at closing

I guess that's it, huh? Gagne is done as our closer. Do we have to keep paying him? At least he took it like a man though and told everyone he stinks. Like Michael Hunt says, he is a man- and I feel bad for him. But how can he suck so hard? Who's the new closer? I hope the new one breaks Coco's record.
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Saturday, May 10, 2008 - Oh YEAH!!!

Rickie Strongs comes through in the clutch! What a victory for our boys! I was so bummed after the sixth- with the runners on the corners and nothing to show :( . But then we had a two-out rally- so demoralizing for the Cubs. I'm so happy for all of them!
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Friday, May 9, 2008 - Playing Dead

Was playing dead really our strategy last night? Were we thinking if we didn't play the Prince, Corey, and Kendall that the Marlins would let down a bit. Well, it didn't really work out that way as they pummeled us and delivered the second sweep in a row. Maybe in the next game we should try some other tricks- like the inbounds the pass while someone goes on all four and barks or we could try some cliassics from Major League. This is so frustrating and will require some serious winning streaks to overcome. We're 2 games below 500 and in 4th place.
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Thursday, May 8, 2008 - It's Always Darkest Before The Dawn

That's what Harvey Dent (Two-Face) says in the trailer for the new Batman movie. And certainly once could say it's getting pretty dark for the losers with our 5th straight loss and another anemic showing by our offense. "These guys don't like this, so there is a bit of frustration," said skipper Ned Yost. "I wouldn't say there is tension, but they're working very hard to get themselves out of it." Maybe it's time for some tension, huh?

But I think there's an even more important question- "Is that even true about it getting dark right before the dawn?" I don't think so. It's obviously darkest in the middle of the night. I guess you could say that once it starts getting light that that's dawn- so of course by definition it's going to be darkest (or darker before the dawn) since dawn is when it gets lighter. But I don't think you can count it like that- dawn can't start at least until 4:30 or so. I think 2am is darker than 3am. QED. Unlike the Brewers, I win.
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Wednesday, May 7, 2008 - Aahhhhhhhhhhhhh

Okay, I don't know if the Brewers got the memo from yesterday. My love is unconditional, but to a point. Does that make sense? No, well who cares. The Brewers stink like a turd in a pool or an egg salad that has been abandoned behind an unused couch. Shutout? Come on hottest bats in the league. I like the fire Ryan Braun is showing- that's right. Get angry and good!
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Tuesday, May 6, 2008 - Get it out of your system

All right everybody, I saw a lot of venting on the boards yesterday. Totally understandable. Now that it's done, let's get it out of the way and concentrate on positivity. I know it's a business and there's a sense of a blind fan being a sucker for spending all the money to make the players and owners rich. That's not how I view sports though- and none of you either. I don't want to be fans like the New York Mets that boo the team every time they make the slightest error. Our boys are trying out there. Our managers and coaches want to win. We have a new owner that is pumping money to the team.

I don't know if we and our cheering or booing really make a difference to the team and their performance, but I like to think so. The Brewers are already playing another team- they don't need to be fighting their own fans too. Listen, I know Gagne stinks. I just love the Brewers so much and want them to win and rattle off 10 in a row!

An astute fan alerted me to change the 24 year-playoff drought to 25 in the PYP pledge. That's done now. I think 25 years is enough.
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Monday, May 5, 2008 - Breakdown- no survivors

That was an extremely rough weekend. After getting hit on Friday with the whole Lamborghini Gallardo torn ACL, the Brewers rose to the challenge and got swept. Obviously the Lamborghini going down is terrible, terrible news. He was definitely our #2 pitcher and some could/would argue ace material.

I was watching the game yesterday- saw 6-2 and Mike Cameron with 2 dongs and thought what a nice storyline for Mike and a great way to end the weekend. I checked back in and it was 6-4 in the 7th. A little nervous, but we still had things under control. Someone told me we lost in the 12th and I was flabberghasted- how can Gagne keep doing this? What's so frustrating about him is that he blows BIG leads- 2 and 3 runs. The heart attack machine needs to stop with that guy. 5 blown saves. Last year all of those are wins- and we're in the top of the standings.
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Sunday, May 4, 2008 - Tough Times

Thank goodness baseball isn't like horse racing where they put down injured players ON THE FIELD! Poor Yovani- I know he'll live to see another day. Also- quite a race going on in the NL Central. If we could have do better against Houston- we'd be in first. Time to avoid the sweep and tear things up.
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Saturday, May 3, 2008 - Bad News

Yovani is gone. And I miss him already. This news is the equivalent of someone taking a dump on your chest. That's never happened to me, but I'm using my imagination and it seems appropriate.
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Friday, May 2, 2008 - Win of the Season?

That really went down to the wire, huh? What an exciting contest- back and forth- a lot of weird things going on (Zambrano dong). But we ended up on the winning side of the ledger and took the series despite a -10 run differential. The two defining moments for me were the doubles that zoomed by Soriano and Fuk-Yo-Dome in the 9th. Each of those could have gone the other way.

Such a fantastic game I don't want to take anything away from it- but the aggressive base-running was quite poor. Both Prince and Rickie were out by a mile (we can be satisfied with runners at third). I know the Prince collision at home will be made a big deal, but it wasn't that powerful of a hit. The Cubs catcher had so much time to collect himself and position himself at an angle to the plate that he almost ole'd him like a bullfighter- with Prince taking the brunt of it. Oh well- bring on the Stros
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Thursday, May 1, 2008 - Uncle!

I give up. I give up! What an amazing game plan by Yost. It's really genius actually. After playing possum and getting thrashed in Game 2, the Cubs think we're a complete joke and we'll be able to sneak away the series today in a gutsy win by our boys in gray. The Cubs erroneously think that run differential is good for something. It's not! They can be +5 in the series with over 34 runs, but as long as we have 2 W's under our belt- I'm cool. Poor Turnbow though- he really threw himself under the bus with that performance.
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Wednesday, April 30, 2008 - Battle-Tested Veterans

And that's the difference Cameron makes. He's a battle-tested veteran that works hard, plays hard, and has lots of medieval weaponry in his locker. He uses his weapons mainly for demonstrations of his vast skills. Bo skills, mace skills, falconry skills, etc. But there are times when he'll have to use his weapons to lay down the law, basically for intimidation purposes. I heard it from a guy who definitely knows that Cameron unsheathed his broad sword after a game during Spring Training one time because someone (I'm pretty sure Suppan) casually remarked that Charlemagne is an overrated king. Obviously, Cameron would have none of it.

Kudos for a great victory in the soon-to-be-named Mars Field. It's going to be a tough series fo shizzy.
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Tuesday, April 29, 2008 - We tease him a lot because we've got him on the spot

I wish Kotter played for the Brewers this year- the whole gang- Horschack and the smooth Barbarino. That was actually the style back in the day though. The 82 Wallbangers could pretty much be the cast for Kotter with their killer hairdos.

What a day, what a day, what a day! We've got a lot going on- some hello's for Cameron, Sheets, and the Cubs and a see ya later to David Bush. Let's hope Sheets can be as dominant against the Cubs as he was in the opener. And Cameron playing us will be quite exciting- this is our lineup now- back to awesomenes and some order.

I like getting all the series at Wrigley out of the way early in the season because they don't count. Did you know these games technically don't matter? They're like the primaries in Michigan and Florida. Just kidding- obviously they count, but it is true that the games at the end of the year count more. I'm going to be so pumped that Miller Park will host the final series against the Cubs. Our guys can enter a raucous and confident crowd where hopefully there will be a little skin laying there on the chopping block. I'm not sure if the goal is to have your skin cut or not- I would imagine "not cut" is the goal, unless it's a hygiene thing.
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Monday, April 28, 2008 - Foofy

There was an article in the New York Times Sunday Sports section about the Prince being a vegetarian. It was funny because it describes Milwaukee as if written by an anthropologist, "Earlier that day, the parking lots at Miller Park were characteristically sizzling with tailgate barbecues — most of them featuring the fatty bratwurst that are all but Wisconsin’s state vegetable. This is the stadium, after all, that during every sixth inning stages a spirited race among five humans dressed as different varieties of weiner product, from Italian sausages to chorizo."

I want to see the stupid author watching the sausage race (why does he call them weiner products?) and not knowing how to cheer. "Good show! What a jolly good show," he yells at the end.
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Sunday, April 27, 2008 - All Hail The Prince!

This was the game of the Prince most definitely. He's like a choo-choo train on that suicide squeeze. I really do love him- he's my big bear.
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Saturday, April 26, 2008 - What a Majestic Animal

Have you ever seen an actual Marlin? They're truly incredible- you'll be on the boat deep-sea fishing and it'll jump in the air and then dive a million feet down. 10 seconds later it pops up 100 feet in front of the boat as the boat is going full-throttle. They're like torpedoes. Scary to think that those monsters are in the ocean! Again, we had our chances last night- bases loaded and all that jazz.
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Friday, April 25, 2008 - Poor Soup

We certainly had our chances last night. Runners on the corners with no outs in the 7th- no production. We paid for aggressive base running in the fourth- but that's okay. It's important that we push it and go for the jugular whenever we can. It's a shame to waste Soup's performance though. One run is a very solid performance. And then Burrell's hit with two outs and two strikes- that's dagger to the heart material. Two-game series are annoying with no victor. I'm a fan of odd game series.
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Thursday, April 24, 2008 - Zing!

"It didn't bother me," the Prince said, who started a vegetarian diet in February. "The only thing is you got people saying it's because I don't eat meat or whatever. But my thing is a lot of people in the stands and you guys, you guys eat meat all day and you guys can't hit a ball."

Phenomenal point by the Prince. I'd be a complete carnivore if it weren't for my girlfriend (who insists on really fun tofu nights and other awesome events like yoga followed by poking myself in the eye), yet I could never hit the longball. It might have something to do with the poor eyesight of my left eye reducing my depth perception- it's a common occurrence in many artists because it helps them see 2-dimensionally and thus draw better. I am actually a terrible artist though too.

I swear I was planning on a weekend poll of who was going to emerge from their slump first? the Prince, Braun, Turnbow, or Gagne? Little did I know the Prince and Turnbow would do it on the same night. Big huzzah for those two! I really love how emotional Turnbow got about it all. To be honest, I'm a little emotional right now too, but that might be because I'm watching Steel Magnolias with the lady.
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Wednesday, April 23, 2008 - Another Barnburner

These extra inning games sure are exhausting. When you win they’re worth all the anxiety (can you imagine losing that 22-inning marathon? Ugh), but there certainly are some signs for worry. Gagne continues to struggle- putting two batters on with no outs? That’s garbage. The extra $4 million for Coco sure looks like a bargain now. And the failed double play due to Rickie Weeks’ weak toss? Unbearable! And Prince- scoop that up to end the game buddddddy!

As they say, a win is a win, and at the end of the season- just the total number matters- not how we got them. Frustrating that if we hadn’t blown that Reds and first Cards game we’d be on a very sweet little (bordering on big) winning streak.
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Tuesday, April 22, 2008 - Old Faithful

As a precautionary measure, Yost is holding Sheets back on Wednesday and he'll miss his first start of the season. Oh man. Why does this have to happen so early? It's a really a shame because he can be so dominant. I feel bad for him because all his injuries are knicky-knack things- a pulled triceps or lat, a really bad hangnail. It's not like he has a knee that continues to blow out and you know he should be put down like an old horse.

It's a shame for Turnbow too- he got his chance last night and did not convert. He's been griping a bit that he's a mop-upper- but with his haircut- can you blame Yost? Zing! If he wants his spot back he needs to perform- no question.
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Monday, April 21, 2008 - Big Ups to the Pope

I'm not going to take the blame for that last loss. My post wasn't a jinx because we actually won the game in the 10th- like we normally do. And then Gagne blew it- AGAIN! Have you seen the stat that from 1999-2006 he had 7 blown saves out of 168 opportunities. From 2007-2008, 7 blown saves (3 this year) in 29 saves. I know it was 4 days in a row, but no excuses. This is downright worrisome.

In other news, big trip by the Pope this past week. I'm half-Polish and fondly remember trips to Polish Fest seeing shirt that said, "Happiness is having a Polish Pope" or "The Ultimate Ski Weekend [listing names like sobieski, woznalski, kernescevski, etc]." Being the Pope is like being the best baseball player- a mass at Yankee Stadium and people love him, constantly cheering, and he keeps raising his hands to the people and smiling real big.
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Sunday, April 20, 2008 - Extra Innings Are A Done Deal

What is going on with the Brewers? We must be deathly allergic to innings past the number 10. Why? Because all we do is end games with a vengeance in the 10th- whether it's the top or bottom- no matter to us. Even though red is my favorite color and my bedroom was painted red as a young child, I'm digging the Reds-killer Billy Hall. He produces runs at the timeliest moments. I like how we took care of the hot Johnny Cueto- one publication said we solved him like the Pythagorean Theorem. A squared + B squared = a sweep!
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Saturday, April 19, 2008 - Oh No!

This is so worrisome. I know Yost and the crew always goes in saying it's not a big deal, that it was just a precautionary measure. But then it turns into a big deal and Sheets is gone for a month and we're on a 4-20 slump. Ack! Poor Benny- he's so dominant on the mound too- just shutting those Reds down like sub-prime mortgages. Someone should staple or tape his triceps to his lat together- or give him a massage. I'd do it- not a big deal if it helped him out. We need you Ben.
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Friday, April 18, 2008 - In Their Own Words

"As soon as he hit, a big weight lifted off his shoulders, and a big weight lifted off our shoulders as a team," reigning NL Rookie of the Year said.

"I was trying to act tough, but I couldn't hold it," the Prince said. "It was like a Little Leaguer. I was jumping up and down like a little kid."

"You've got to understand how long the season is, and you've got to understand players getting in sync," Yost said. "He hits them in bunches."

"You've always got to promise yourself you're going to be as positive as you can, no matter what," the Prince said. "It was actually getting easier, to tell you the truth, the worse I was doing. I just kind of realized that whatever's going to happen is going to happen."

"I got myself into a jam and I got out of it," Gagne said. "That's just a lot of positives."


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